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smashconTitle: Disturbances in SOLDIER
Author: Enchanter/Enchan
Rating: PG
Prompt: Exploration
Fandom/Series: Final Fantasy 7
Word Count: 2025 Words
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or any of the characters. This is purely a fan based story.
Summary: There is only one word to describe this story... WHY? The answer: It had to be done.
Disturbances in SOLDIER
The life of a SOLDIER, First Class was exciting for most. It was filled with danger around every turn with monsters snarling ferociously or even silently lurking in the darkness, waiting for the right moment to attack...
Right now though, the only danger that threatened Sephiroth was the vicious possibility of a paper cut or an avalanche of deadly fan letters stacked far too high. Even then, one could never cross out an attack of ink splattering over fingers that clutched a pen too tightly. The horror.
Shinra had promised every letter written to the hero would be answered promptly to promote its degrading image, thinking that they could gain back more support by treating the company more like an escort service, or so Sephiroth interpreted it.
It seemed so unnecessary.. But then again so was the shampoo add plastered over sector 5 advertising the silver haired hunk using his favourite brand with the words 'because I'm worth it' added below. Funny, Sephiroth didn't remember saying that.
Without even knocking, an unannounced guest flung the hero's door open, disturbing him from those deeply important thoughts. A bounce in every step signalled something truly terrifying with delicately crafted leather boots clinging to masculine calves in a way that should never be seen on a man... Ever...
Almost afraid to look up yet too curious not to, the mako eyed SOLDIER dared to chance his fate and raised his eyes to see something no man could ever prepare himself for. The sight of Zack Fair dressed in a short sleeved crimson gown that reached his ankles, a slit on the right side up to a very muscular thigh. Even his hair had extensions curled into ringlets and lips were smothered with far too much red lipstick.
Perhaps he had taken the thought about Shinra's attempt at a new image just a little too far.. It seemed he had conjured something truly disturbing with those thoughts.
A surprisingly confident Zack wheeled in a rather large box, bigger than the very man pulling the cart. With complete disinterest in the work the famous man had immersed himself in, the dark haired SOLDIER was strutting toward Sephiroth like a model upon the open stage, offering views the chance to see his elegance and perfection.
…WHY?!
Zack seemed to have no concept of how he appeared to others (deeply disturbing, to say it politely) and instead set the large box off to the side of the door quickly. Before anything could be said he glanced toward the silver haired hero before him as if gracing a mere mortal with the gaze of an almighty angel.
“Let me try to make this as clear as possible... Leave. Immediately.”
The message was rather clear and though anyone else hearing such a comment from the hero of Shinra would eagerly obey, Zack pouted his ruby red lips and glanced at the prodigy of Shina with a deeply wounded look.
“Sephy, now why do you have to be like that? We all have our own projects to attend to in times of peace. You have your fan letters, I have my cross dressing...”
The silver haired prodigy immediately held his hand up as if the sheer spoken words were far too much for him to handle. Those mako eyes narrowed as he spoke with clear annoyance, perhaps not really even looking for an answer so much as just asking the question for God to hear him say it out loud so it was clear he wanted NOTHING to do with this.
“Why cross dressing?”
Zack Fair immediate rolled his eyes, as if the answer was common knowledge to everyone except Sephiroth, who seemed to have missed the memo somehow. Maybe he had been too busy with the upkeep of that gorgeous hair to notice the obvious.
“Oh don't think I don't know, Sephy. I heard ALL about Cloud's escapades in a dress and I will NOT be second rate to someone who could kill a monster with his pointy hair alone.”
Taking a moment, Sephiroth glanced up for just long enough to note that Zack's usual hairstyle had still been employed while avoiding a duration that would surely burn his eyes clean out of their sockets. Indeed, even though he was wearing extensions, the top was still very pointy but Zack seemed oblivious at how ironic his point was, so Sephiroth let it slide. There were more important things to think about.
“What is in the box? More fan letters?”
Expecting the question, Zack winked and held out his hand to point at the silver haired hero with a grin, muscular shoulders far too apparent in the short sleeved dress flexing subconsciously.
“We'll get to that later. The real issue is you know you can't deny is that Cloud isn't the only one who looks damn good in a dress!”
There was nothing more to say at this point. What could you possibly say to someone cross dressing so poorly who believed themselves to be some forgotten diva everyone was dying to worship?
However, the silence Sephiroth employed did not go unnoticed, Zack instead used it as a turning point in the conversation, stepping around the desk slowly as he spoke, each step freakishly dainty.
“Now Sephiroth. We both know what I am really here for.”
Without even looking up from the stack of fan letters the silver haired Soldier responded with an exasperated expression, so sick of being hounded about the same thing every day.
“For the last time, I am not writing about how great you are in my responses to these letters.”
Immediately Zack slammed both hands down on the table, making the piles of letters shudder dangerously, leaning one way and then the other before miraculously steadying themselves.
“Come ON Sephy. How can you even handle so many? If you write about me to at least a few then give them my mail code, you can at least get some off of your plate.. You KNOW I would even go on a few dates with them, show them some of that Shinra hospitality.”
It was always like this... Minus the dress. Zack was always itching to get himself in on the action, to be seen as a hero and known as someone popular with the ladies to avoid his fortnightly visits from Rufus giving him those creepy eyes as if he hadn't been proven straight. In an outfit like this, who could even blame the President for thinking such things?
“The answer is no.”
Perhaps it was about time he just recorded that two letter word and played it on repeat every time the reckless student of Angeal managed to barge into his office. It would save so much time and increase productivity.
“I know what you are thinking, that this is all about me.. But its not.”
It was ALWAYS about Zack. ESPECIALLY when he said it wasn't.
“It's about you. You're so hard working and watching you slave away like this, I knew I HAD to do something for you. Let me take on some of your burden Sephy. Do you really need SO many fangirls that need to be answered every other day? Surely you'd like more time to spend with Cloud.”
“Cloud?”
Blinking as if pulled out of a daze at the mention of a familiar name, those mako eyes narrowed and sought into Zack's devious orbs, making the mistake of listening for once.
“Yes Cloud. Blond pointy haired guy, looks almost as good as me in a dress? He's totally lonely without you Sephy. If you're not going to do this for yourself, at least do it for him.”
Those eyes conveyed such sincerity, the kind that was practised in front of a mirror over and over until it cracked. It was all too obvious Zack was desperate, Rufus must have really been lonely with Tseng out training the new recruits.
“I am not buying it.”
“Oh Sephy, you really have no idea do you? He looks at you with such bright, shinning eyes, aching for a role model to follow into the unknown. He WANTS you to take the time to teach him everything there is to learn. Everything...”
A silver eyebrow raised before eyes narrowed with dangerous intent. The masamune was just an arms length away, it became such a beautiful fantasy to consider driving that impressive blade through Zack's throat while he continued talking, oh the sounds would be such a masterpiece.
“What are you insinuating?”
As if hearing those thoughts Zack patted Sephiroth on the back lightly and shook his head with a nervous, half joking expression, shaking his head insistently.
“Nothing at all..”
This was growing quite tedious. Those mountains of fan letters were not going to respond to themselves and already it seemed as though precious time in his day had been wasted on Zack's shenanigans. If things continued like this, he was sure to be kept after hours.
“You've wasted enough of my time already.”
Before the satisfying speech about how precious Sephiroth's time truly was could be spoken, Zack nodded and lifted his hands off of those broad, masculine shoulders speaking quickly. If he wanted to close the deal, now would be the time. He had to go all out and make sure to get what he wanted before he left that office... Looking damn fine.
“You are right, I have.. So why don't we make a trade?”
“You have nothing I want.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course I am sure.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“.... Absolutely double dead sure?”
“Zack!”
The pride and joy of SOLDIER stood up and slammed his hands down on the table, toppling the piles of letters over to fall onto that proud male, a few even getting lodged in that perfect hair for a few seconds before sliding through the strands, far too smooth to cling to.
At the sound of that terrifying voice, Zack tugged off the box that obstructed the true content that had been wheeled in on the standard looking platform, doing the one thing nothing else could do and stopping Sephiroth in his tracks before a bloody rampage could ensue.
A bright pink cake stood before the heroic SOLDIER, First Class freshly baked and decorated with exotic fruits and cream delicately placed strategically upon each layer to accentuate the appearance of the centrepiece of a half naked Cloud with a strawberry shaped gag and cream arranged carefully to cover his chest with cherries on top. The rest of the blond was encased by the cake like a prison holding his arms and legs in place.
Swirls of fresh cream were dotted over the spiked hair to add insult to injury and the worst part was, even though he was struggling, it remained in place. Damn, that hair was solid.
“Trade you?”
Zack's impish voice interrupted SO many thoughts that were swirling around his mind. This was pure insanity, so he did the only thing he could do... He opted to allow Zack to keep his disturbing life in order to gain the ever elusive Cloud Cake he had clearly NEVER been dreaming of.
“........ Take what you can carry and write to them yourself. Now GET OUT!”
“SOLD!”
Zack responded clapping both hands together before Sephiroth could think it over, lifting up the front of the dress to stack letters against fabric. Rushing out the door he noticed a very broken looking Reno in the doorway, one side of his face twitching while one hand was raised as if he was just about ready to knock before stopping with absolute terror when he realised what he had walked in on.
Walking past Reno, Zack winked as he dashed past before Sephiroth could take back the letters of those surely single and looking ladies that could appreciate the strength of a man comfortable in a dress.
“Don't even ask me for the recipe, Reno. It's a Fair family secret!”
Voting is now closed.
Please take the time to comment on the fanfic. Thanks.
Author: Enchanter/Enchan
Rating: PG
Prompt: Exploration
Fandom/Series: Final Fantasy 7
Word Count: 2025 Words
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or any of the characters. This is purely a fan based story.
Summary: There is only one word to describe this story... WHY? The answer: It had to be done.
Disturbances in SOLDIER
The life of a SOLDIER, First Class was exciting for most. It was filled with danger around every turn with monsters snarling ferociously or even silently lurking in the darkness, waiting for the right moment to attack...
Right now though, the only danger that threatened Sephiroth was the vicious possibility of a paper cut or an avalanche of deadly fan letters stacked far too high. Even then, one could never cross out an attack of ink splattering over fingers that clutched a pen too tightly. The horror.
Shinra had promised every letter written to the hero would be answered promptly to promote its degrading image, thinking that they could gain back more support by treating the company more like an escort service, or so Sephiroth interpreted it.
It seemed so unnecessary.. But then again so was the shampoo add plastered over sector 5 advertising the silver haired hunk using his favourite brand with the words 'because I'm worth it' added below. Funny, Sephiroth didn't remember saying that.
Without even knocking, an unannounced guest flung the hero's door open, disturbing him from those deeply important thoughts. A bounce in every step signalled something truly terrifying with delicately crafted leather boots clinging to masculine calves in a way that should never be seen on a man... Ever...
Almost afraid to look up yet too curious not to, the mako eyed SOLDIER dared to chance his fate and raised his eyes to see something no man could ever prepare himself for. The sight of Zack Fair dressed in a short sleeved crimson gown that reached his ankles, a slit on the right side up to a very muscular thigh. Even his hair had extensions curled into ringlets and lips were smothered with far too much red lipstick.
Perhaps he had taken the thought about Shinra's attempt at a new image just a little too far.. It seemed he had conjured something truly disturbing with those thoughts.
A surprisingly confident Zack wheeled in a rather large box, bigger than the very man pulling the cart. With complete disinterest in the work the famous man had immersed himself in, the dark haired SOLDIER was strutting toward Sephiroth like a model upon the open stage, offering views the chance to see his elegance and perfection.
…WHY?!
Zack seemed to have no concept of how he appeared to others (deeply disturbing, to say it politely) and instead set the large box off to the side of the door quickly. Before anything could be said he glanced toward the silver haired hero before him as if gracing a mere mortal with the gaze of an almighty angel.
“Let me try to make this as clear as possible... Leave. Immediately.”
The message was rather clear and though anyone else hearing such a comment from the hero of Shinra would eagerly obey, Zack pouted his ruby red lips and glanced at the prodigy of Shina with a deeply wounded look.
“Sephy, now why do you have to be like that? We all have our own projects to attend to in times of peace. You have your fan letters, I have my cross dressing...”
The silver haired prodigy immediately held his hand up as if the sheer spoken words were far too much for him to handle. Those mako eyes narrowed as he spoke with clear annoyance, perhaps not really even looking for an answer so much as just asking the question for God to hear him say it out loud so it was clear he wanted NOTHING to do with this.
“Why cross dressing?”
Zack Fair immediate rolled his eyes, as if the answer was common knowledge to everyone except Sephiroth, who seemed to have missed the memo somehow. Maybe he had been too busy with the upkeep of that gorgeous hair to notice the obvious.
“Oh don't think I don't know, Sephy. I heard ALL about Cloud's escapades in a dress and I will NOT be second rate to someone who could kill a monster with his pointy hair alone.”
Taking a moment, Sephiroth glanced up for just long enough to note that Zack's usual hairstyle had still been employed while avoiding a duration that would surely burn his eyes clean out of their sockets. Indeed, even though he was wearing extensions, the top was still very pointy but Zack seemed oblivious at how ironic his point was, so Sephiroth let it slide. There were more important things to think about.
“What is in the box? More fan letters?”
Expecting the question, Zack winked and held out his hand to point at the silver haired hero with a grin, muscular shoulders far too apparent in the short sleeved dress flexing subconsciously.
“We'll get to that later. The real issue is you know you can't deny is that Cloud isn't the only one who looks damn good in a dress!”
There was nothing more to say at this point. What could you possibly say to someone cross dressing so poorly who believed themselves to be some forgotten diva everyone was dying to worship?
However, the silence Sephiroth employed did not go unnoticed, Zack instead used it as a turning point in the conversation, stepping around the desk slowly as he spoke, each step freakishly dainty.
“Now Sephiroth. We both know what I am really here for.”
Without even looking up from the stack of fan letters the silver haired Soldier responded with an exasperated expression, so sick of being hounded about the same thing every day.
“For the last time, I am not writing about how great you are in my responses to these letters.”
Immediately Zack slammed both hands down on the table, making the piles of letters shudder dangerously, leaning one way and then the other before miraculously steadying themselves.
“Come ON Sephy. How can you even handle so many? If you write about me to at least a few then give them my mail code, you can at least get some off of your plate.. You KNOW I would even go on a few dates with them, show them some of that Shinra hospitality.”
It was always like this... Minus the dress. Zack was always itching to get himself in on the action, to be seen as a hero and known as someone popular with the ladies to avoid his fortnightly visits from Rufus giving him those creepy eyes as if he hadn't been proven straight. In an outfit like this, who could even blame the President for thinking such things?
“The answer is no.”
Perhaps it was about time he just recorded that two letter word and played it on repeat every time the reckless student of Angeal managed to barge into his office. It would save so much time and increase productivity.
“I know what you are thinking, that this is all about me.. But its not.”
It was ALWAYS about Zack. ESPECIALLY when he said it wasn't.
“It's about you. You're so hard working and watching you slave away like this, I knew I HAD to do something for you. Let me take on some of your burden Sephy. Do you really need SO many fangirls that need to be answered every other day? Surely you'd like more time to spend with Cloud.”
“Cloud?”
Blinking as if pulled out of a daze at the mention of a familiar name, those mako eyes narrowed and sought into Zack's devious orbs, making the mistake of listening for once.
“Yes Cloud. Blond pointy haired guy, looks almost as good as me in a dress? He's totally lonely without you Sephy. If you're not going to do this for yourself, at least do it for him.”
Those eyes conveyed such sincerity, the kind that was practised in front of a mirror over and over until it cracked. It was all too obvious Zack was desperate, Rufus must have really been lonely with Tseng out training the new recruits.
“I am not buying it.”
“Oh Sephy, you really have no idea do you? He looks at you with such bright, shinning eyes, aching for a role model to follow into the unknown. He WANTS you to take the time to teach him everything there is to learn. Everything...”
A silver eyebrow raised before eyes narrowed with dangerous intent. The masamune was just an arms length away, it became such a beautiful fantasy to consider driving that impressive blade through Zack's throat while he continued talking, oh the sounds would be such a masterpiece.
“What are you insinuating?”
As if hearing those thoughts Zack patted Sephiroth on the back lightly and shook his head with a nervous, half joking expression, shaking his head insistently.
“Nothing at all..”
This was growing quite tedious. Those mountains of fan letters were not going to respond to themselves and already it seemed as though precious time in his day had been wasted on Zack's shenanigans. If things continued like this, he was sure to be kept after hours.
“You've wasted enough of my time already.”
Before the satisfying speech about how precious Sephiroth's time truly was could be spoken, Zack nodded and lifted his hands off of those broad, masculine shoulders speaking quickly. If he wanted to close the deal, now would be the time. He had to go all out and make sure to get what he wanted before he left that office... Looking damn fine.
“You are right, I have.. So why don't we make a trade?”
“You have nothing I want.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course I am sure.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“.... Absolutely double dead sure?”
“Zack!”
The pride and joy of SOLDIER stood up and slammed his hands down on the table, toppling the piles of letters over to fall onto that proud male, a few even getting lodged in that perfect hair for a few seconds before sliding through the strands, far too smooth to cling to.
At the sound of that terrifying voice, Zack tugged off the box that obstructed the true content that had been wheeled in on the standard looking platform, doing the one thing nothing else could do and stopping Sephiroth in his tracks before a bloody rampage could ensue.
A bright pink cake stood before the heroic SOLDIER, First Class freshly baked and decorated with exotic fruits and cream delicately placed strategically upon each layer to accentuate the appearance of the centrepiece of a half naked Cloud with a strawberry shaped gag and cream arranged carefully to cover his chest with cherries on top. The rest of the blond was encased by the cake like a prison holding his arms and legs in place.
Swirls of fresh cream were dotted over the spiked hair to add insult to injury and the worst part was, even though he was struggling, it remained in place. Damn, that hair was solid.
“Trade you?”
Zack's impish voice interrupted SO many thoughts that were swirling around his mind. This was pure insanity, so he did the only thing he could do... He opted to allow Zack to keep his disturbing life in order to gain the ever elusive Cloud Cake he had clearly NEVER been dreaming of.
“........ Take what you can carry and write to them yourself. Now GET OUT!”
“SOLD!”
Zack responded clapping both hands together before Sephiroth could think it over, lifting up the front of the dress to stack letters against fabric. Rushing out the door he noticed a very broken looking Reno in the doorway, one side of his face twitching while one hand was raised as if he was just about ready to knock before stopping with absolute terror when he realised what he had walked in on.
Walking past Reno, Zack winked as he dashed past before Sephiroth could take back the letters of those surely single and looking ladies that could appreciate the strength of a man comfortable in a dress.
“Don't even ask me for the recipe, Reno. It's a Fair family secret!”
Voting is now closed.
Please take the time to comment on the fanfic. Thanks.
