smashcon | [2016] Choose Me! - (Ficlet Category) (Reply)

Title: Choose Me!
Rating: G
Prompt: They did not know it was impossible, so they did it. – Mark Twain
Fandom/Series: Hunter x Hunter
Word Count: 682
Disclaimer: I do not, in any way, profit from the story and all creative rights to the characters belong to their original creator(s).
Summary: Leorio and Kuroro are fighting over who would be a better date for Kurapika.

*~*~*~*

Choose Me!

Leorio: Hey Kurapika let’s go out.

Kurapika: …We’re already outside.

Leorio: I mean… let’s go out on a date!

Kurapika: Um no offence Leorio but I’d rather not.

Leorio: Why not? We’re already friends so what’s wrong with taking another step further?

Kurapika: A lot. I think it’s better if we just stay friends.

Leorio: Aw come on Kurapika how do you know you won’t like it if you haven’t tried it. Please just one date…

Kurapika: Leorio I really don’t…

Leorio: Please!

Kuroro: Why don’t you give it up? He already said no.

Kurapika: You! *Eyes turn scarlet*

Kuroro: Hey there beautiful.

Leorio: Oi! Who are you calling beautiful?!

Kuroro: Why don’t you ditch this guy and go on a date with me instead.

Kurapika: What?!

Kuroro: You heard me.

Leorio: Don’t ignore me!

Kuroro: *Sigh* Can’t you see we’re having a very important conversation here.

Leorio: Like hell you are and what do you think you’re doing asking him out?! He’s with me if you haven’t noticed!

Kuroro: Oh really because I recall he rejected your offer a moment ago.

Leorio: He didn’t reject it!

Kurapika: Actually I did… but it doesn’t mean I’ll go out with you either!

Kuroro: Why not? I’m sure I’m better than this buffoon.

Leorio: Who are you calling a buffoon and in what way are you a better date for Kurapika than me?!

Kuroro: Well for one… he seems much more excited to see me than you. His eyes even turned scarlet.

Leorio: That’s from anger!

Kuroro: So? They still turned red when they saw me, not you.

Kurapika: Um… Can I say something?

Leorio: Not now Kurapika.

Kurapika: *Glares*

Leorio: Oh hey look! He can get angry at me too.

Kurapika: That’s not a good thing!

Kuroro: See even he agrees with me.

Leorio: What?! But you-

Kuroro: Besides it’s obvious I’m the better choice for him. I’ve even met his family already.

Leorio: Yeah, when you murdered them!

Kuroro: That happened several years ago. Why don’t you let it go already?

Leorio: Kurapika hasn’t let it go! Have you forgotten the time in York Shin when he was trying to destroy you and the Ryodan?!

Kuroro: We both like books.

Leorio: Don’t change the subject! Wait, what are you talking about?

Kuroro: I’m talking about the fact that both Kurapika and I like to read books.

Kurapika: Since when do you know what books I like?

Leorio: Exactly and for your information I read books all the time!

Kuroro: Not including medical books?

Leorio: Uh… well… I’m planning to read other books in the future and I bet it’ll be the same ones Kurapika has read, right Kurapika?

Kurapika: I don’t know Leorio I read some pretty big, sophisticated books…

Leorio: Wha! What are you implying?!

Kuroro: *Snickers*

Leorio: What are you laughing at?!

Kuroro: The fact that he basically called you stupid. Isn’t that right Kurapika?

Leorio: He did not! Right Kurapika?

Kurapika: … *Looks away*

Leorio: Ok maybe I’m not as smart as Kurapika or… you but there is something way more important than books that Kurapika and I have in common that you don’t.

Kuroro: Oh, enlighten me.

Leorio: We’re both not thieves and murderers!

Kurapika: Didn’t Gon catch you stealing some fish at the docks and didn’t you tell me to kill that guy in the Hunter Exam?

Leorio: Kurapika you’re not helping and that’s different. Those were… justified.

Kuroro: And what makes you so sure my actions weren’t justified as well?

Leorio: You call killing a whole clan just to sell their eyes for money justified?!

Kuroro: Well I admit that was a mistake, which it why I’m going to start making amends for it right now by taking Kurapika to dinner.

Leorio: How is that making amends?! Kurapika let me a friend take you to dinner.

Kuroro: Precisely you’re just a friend so let me-

Leorio: At least I’m not his sworn enemy!

Kuroro/Leorio: Well? Who are you going to choose Kurapika?!

Kurapika: Hmm… Let me think about it… Neither! *Punches both in the face* …Idiots.